Showing all entries for February 2012
These are not my toofs.
You know this right, me and my dental woes? If you know me you know this. If you don't, the short version goes something like this: I was a wee little sickly Elle and after years and years and years of antibiotics, my teeth are all screwed up. So every couple of years I can tell a story that goes something like this: Yeah, I went in for a cleaning at 11 that morning and walked out 6 hours later with 6 new teeth.
That was last year's adventure. This year, I got my #12 pulled. Yes, I know my teeth by their numbers, isn't that awesome?
I had a tooth pulled once before, many, many years ago, a back molar. But this one is an upper tooth, one of my "smile" teeth, so now with this gaping hole/wound in my mouth I look like one of my old Mill City neighbors (or Amy Winehouse, your pick). They gave me a temp, but it's like this retainer thing with one tooth, and never mind that it's incredibly uncomfortable, it's just plain STUPID. I can't eat with it, can barely talk with it, and shouldn't wear it if I want my toothhole to heal. So why did they give it to me? Cosmetic reasons. What, am I a supermodel? I am so returning this thing.
Anyway, so IMPLANT. I'm getting an implant. I've had crowns and bridges up the wazoo, but never an implant. You know what I have in my jaw right now? A SCREW. Yes they took out my tooth (which took 2 hours, by the way) and replaced it WITH A SCREW. And then in all seriousness my dentist says to me:
Don't worry, it's not big enough to set off metal detectors at the airport or anything like that.
O. M. G.
Anyway, the meds, LOL. He gives me Ibuprofen horse pills and Vicodin-but-not-Vicodin. I don't care if it is or it isn't, all I know is it makes me sick to my stomach and I don't want any. Oh, I'll give you an anti-nausea pill too, he says.
Whatever, I don't really plan on taking it so I don't really care. Until I had to pay for it, that is. The Ibuprofen, the VbnV, the antibiotics, $4 each. The don't puke pill? $54. ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?!? Well shit, now I have to take it.
OMG, this is FUN! But I am very stupid. And I need help doing complex tasks, like putting one foot in front of the other while simultaneously maintaining balance and fighting gravity. LOL. I'm sorry, was I saying something?
Oh, I know:
Oh HaiHow about the Toronto Zoo's New Baby Polar Bear?
See also: om nom nom snow!
Or how about:
BooUnhappy kitty bath?
See also: sleepy kitty is sleepy and sleepy puppy is full. Or maybe it's full puppy is sleepy?
Or even better:
OinkA teeny tiny smiling pig in a blanket.
We also have:
Sleeping dangerouslyA gallery of sleepy koalas
...a happy, happy hippo:
Say Cheese!THIS IS PHOTOBOMB!
and some dogs playing fetch:
Happy Monday, everyone
messenger bag mug shot
So this last week (ish) I've been sick. Not like, Oh, I have the flu, or OMG, I'm dying of the plague, more like Ick, I feel like I've been hit by a truck and is this what getting old feels like damn this really sucks. Throw in some allergies and general female malaise (sorry dude folk) and it was a stellar week. And by stellar I mean mostly I turned into a hermit. And one day I ate nothing but donuts. Well, that's not entirely true, after the third donut I got this awful Did you seriously eat THREE DONUTS TODAY? headache, so then I ate a banana.
It didn't help.
Anyway, all that to say I got a lot of sewing done this week. I tackled messenger bags, see? SEE? The little ones are for my nieces. I LOVE having nieces because they LOVE everything you make them and they totally don't notice your mistakes.
Oh, and an apron. I made an apron too.
And some flannel PJ pants. I made those first so I could wear them all week. Proper prior planning, my friends.
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